Thursday, September 25, 2008

Sophy and Challenges

Yes, I'm still learning from Sophy. One of the things that's clear to me is that while she likes to climb in my lap and she likes hugs and being petted, what she needs from me even more is to have me keep her safe.

I know she'd love to eat dead birds or chase rabbits and birds we find on our daily walks. But that wouldn't be a good idea and could be really bad for her health—especially if she dashed into the road, not understanding how dangerous that could be. Just as I had to keep my kids safe when they were growing up—even if it made them angry with me—I have to keep Sophy safe. What she thinks she wants isn't necessarily good for her.

I also need to be careful not to become hostage to what she wants and needs. I have to remind myself it's okay to take time for myself to do things that are important to me even if she's not happy being left home alone. And gradually she's learning that I always do come home—sometimes sooner than she expects.

I'm learning to let go of some things. To accept that there will occasionally (less and less often now) be “accidents” and that some things might get damaged as she and I learn what limits need to be set and precautions taken. And that ultimately life is sometimes messy but the joy that comes with having Sophy far outweighs these little setbacks.

As the rest of the country seems to spin into panic over the financial situation, Sophy helps me keep focused on the things I can take care of and to let go of what I can't. That's a very useful lesson right now. She reminds me that there's no point in wasting my energy trying to change what I cannot change—whether it's companies failing or Sophy's need to chase birds and rabbits—and to focus on what I can do—whether it's make sure I pay my bills on time or keep her on a short leash when I know there are likely to be rabbits and birds which could cause her to suddenly try to take off chasing them. Doesn't matter how much harder it makes my life that something is happening—the only useful focus for my energy and attention is on what I CAN do to ameliorate the situation.

And she makes me laugh. Every day. Several times a day. She reminds me that no matter what is going on in my life or the world, there are reasons to smile or laugh—if we look for them—and that when we do smile or laugh, it helps to nourish our resilience and ability to cope with those things that might otherwise knock us down.

Here's hoping you have someone or something that makes you laugh every day. And that you are finding ways to do the things you can and to let go of whatever might be out of your control. Sending blessings and safe and gentle ((((((hugs))))))),

April_optimist

Here is Sophy reminding me that there are some things one just cannot change--no matter how much one wishes one could. Like fitting through an opening that's waaaay too small....


6 comments:

Mary said...

Sophy is so cute. And it is a great feeling knowing that someone can make you laugh especially when you are feeling down. I have a very good friend who always makes me laugh, and helps me get through the darkest times..take care..Mary

jm said...

as you said, no sense worrying about what you have no control over, focus on what you can and how it effects you and those you care about. we are so glad you and Sophy are bonding. may you have many, many years together.

peace and blessings

keepers

therapydoc said...

It's good to learn from your people, I mean, pets.

Karma said...

Still miss my dog --- if I'm not commenting, its not because I'm not here. just trying not to think about it

gypsy-heart said...

Sophy has brought you good energies, love, and laughter!!
Life before Sophy..was BS. eh,eh,eh

So happy for both of you!

April_optimist said...

Mary, Thank you. Laughter makes a huge difference, doesn't it?

Keepers, Thank you. Blessings to you, as well.

Therapydoc, LOL! Absolutely! My latest post, in fact, is about being willing to learn from others...

Karma, Is there any chance you could get another dog?

Gypsy-Heart, ROFL!! When I talk about writing I often refer to BC and AC (before and after children). Now you've given me a new one--BS and AS.