Wednesday, November 14, 2007


I’ve been doing a lot of coaching lately and it’s reminded me that no matter who I’m coaching about what kind of writing, what matters is the other person’s voice, the other person’s story.

My job isn’t to tell someone how I would write it better, it’s to help the other person see a way to write the best way they can,the particular story THEY have to tell, with their strongest, most unique voice.

And I find myself thinking how important it is that we each find our own voices. That we each find a way to say the things we need to say—whether to others or to ourselves.

I find myself thinking of my friend who stood up to her brother, the first time anyone in her family has. And I know that even though her siblings and her mother have turned on her, the nieces and nephews in that family are watching and seeing that it’s possible to say: No! This isn’t right! And they are seeing that it’s possible to take action.

We are shaped by what we say and what we hear, by the pictures we paint and the ones we see, by the things we feel or cause others to feel, by the ideas we think and when we help others to think in new ways. We shape ourselves and have a chance to shape the world in which we live by finding our “voices”—whether those voices are actual voices or written or painted or shaped into physical objects.

When the internet was first created people said it would isolate individuals, divide us, and stifle us. Instead, the internet has helped so many of us find new friends all around the world, create or join communities of people who share our ideas or passions or talents or joy or pain. It has given many of us access to resources we might otherwise never have known about. Sometimes it has given some of us the courage to make changes in our lives.

I believe in the power of voices. I believe in the power of one person to create profound change in the world. I believe with Marianne Williamson that we are not meant to hide our light under a bushel but rather to let it shine for all the world to see.

Here’s hoping that each of you finds or has found and celebrates YOUR unique voice. Sending blessings and safe and gentle (((((((hugs))))))),


Beauty said...

I know that in the year and a half that I've been blogging, my voice has grown stronger. The women I've met in cyberspace--survivors like me--have taught me so much. I hope they've learned something valuable from me as well.

The more we women voice our uniqueness and strength, the better it will go for future generations.

keepers said...

we agree that the internet has made us heard more and let us hear more, and the friendships we have now, the caring, the concern, are all so wonderful. we had no direction unitl we set up our website and our blog and our ministry, and we hope we and many others will continue to let our voices be heard for multiples and survivors the world over.

peace and blessings


Enola said...

I don't know what I would do without the inernet. It is so wonderful to have the support of all my internet friends. It really has assisted in my healing.

jumpinginpuddles said...

heeheh we have lots of voices anyone want to borrow one :P:P:P:P

therapydoc said...

I find that when I write that I have many voices and I have to decide which one suits which post. Thanks for helping others find theirs.

Marj aka Thriver said...

I know that learning assertiveness and finding my voice has been a big thing for me and my recovery. I used to think I had no rights, so I didn't speak up for them. When I first found I had PTSD and was having flashbacks and terrible nightmares, I couldn't even scream--I would open my mouth and nothing would come out.

But, we can't advocate for ourselves, children, or other survivors unless we find our voices. The internet has really helped there as well. Another great post, April!

Rising Rainbow said...

Yes, this is a great post. I believe that finding our own "voice" is an integral step in the healing process.

And leave it to JIP to want to share! lol

April_optimist said...

Beauty, I'm thrilled to hear the strength in your voice!

Keepers, Your voice is definitely making a difference.

Enola, Isn't it wonderful to be able to be in contact with others who understand?

Jumping in Puddles, ROFL!!!

Therapy Doc, YES!!! This is one of the things I emphasize when I'm coaching writers (or public speakers)--the voice we choose matters. Different voices are more effective with different material and different audiences.

Marj, And what a powerful voice you've developed! So many of us are grateful that you have.

Rising Rainbow, Absolutely. It's part of taking back our lives and our right to be heard and to speak the truth. Something we couldn't do while we were being abused.

Karma said...

A good lesson...

zennist said...

To you, too! I struggle with speaking to myself and speaking to readers. They are very different voices.

April_optimist said...

Karma, Thanks.

Zennist, Yes, every audience has its own voice that would be most effective--whether that audience is us or someone else.