Saturday, February 18, 2006

No Matter What

No matter what we may have in our past, we can choose TODAY to begin to create the life we want to have. We can begin TODAY to be happy. We can choose to let go of guilt. We can choose to let go of anger. We can choose to let go of fear.

Note: I am NOT saying it is easy! I am saying that we can take the first step to go from where we are to being able to be happy and feel safe and learn how to love. We can forgive ourselves for past mistakes. Obsessing over them only limits our ability to do better now. When we focus, instead, on what we can do right or do well and who we want to be, we become more and more able to be that person we want to be. When we create for ourselves a sense of our own strength, we are more likely to be able to take steps to speak up and ask for kindness and respect. When we feel safe, we are free to be honest with the world.

It begins with little steps. It begins with moments during the day when we let ourselves feel safe and happy. It begins with imagining a safe place where no one can hurt us and learning what that feels like. It begins with accepting that the past is over and we cannot change it, taking a deep breath, and looking at where we want to go and what we want to do. It begins with letting ourselves believe that change IS possible.

I truly believe that all intentional harm done in this world grows out of someone’s fear and self-doubt or self-hate. That’s where most unintentional harm comes from as well. The best way to make certain that WE do not do harm is to love ourselves, forgive ourselves, and learn to trust ourselves. The best way to make certain we do not hurt others out of fear is to focus on what we can do to make our lives what we want them to be. This may mean learning new skills or taking a hard look at some issues we have been avoiding, but we can do it. And we have a much better shot at creating the lives we want to have if our energy is not going into fear or obsessing about our mistakes.

No one is perfect. No one. To be alive is to make mistakes. And that’s reassuring to know. Change is possible. Happiness is possible. Love is possible. No matter what the past has held, we can create lives we want to live.

Sending safe and gentle (((((((hugs))))))),

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